Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Are you a Member of the Sisterhood?

My friend, Tess Grant, and I recently realized we have a sisterhood.  We would prefer that it was the "Sisterhood of the Bestselling Novel." Instead we are members of the "Sisterhood of the Bum." This is a much larger group.  Anyone with children in diapers or potty training, or new puppies or aging household pets may be a member.

To see if you are a member of the Sisterhood, study the list below.

You might be a member of the Sisterhood of the Bum, if...

- You wash your hands with Lysol.

- You've considered buying stock in Brawny and having it delivered to your house by the pallet.

- You've interrupted preparing for or eating a meal to clean up a mess.

- Paper towel, Lysol, and carpet cleaner are always within arm's reach.

- You've discovered messes in the middle of the night... with your bare feet.

- You don't go to the bathroom yourself because you are tired of being in the bathroom and/or don't want to wash your hands again.

- You associate the smell of carpet cleaner with excrement.

- You've spent so much time encouraging your toddler to pee, that you have to go yourself.

- You never throw about Wal-mart bags because you use them to contain the soiled paper towels, etc.  And you frequently run out.

- You've spent more time than you want to admit thinking about how to get a urine sample from your child, and then how to transport it to the doctor's office. (Hint: Dr's office has collection kits for the second part of this. Good luck getting your kid to pee in them.)

If you answered "Yes," "Been there, done that," or "Just this morning" to more than one of these, welcome to the Sisterhood.

(Sorry, there are no benefits to membership. I am told the children eventually are potty trained, but so far it seems a vicious rumor.)

If you aren’t sure if you qualify, check out Tess Grant’s blog for more stipulations. 

6 comments:

  1. Nope, I am not a current member of the sisterhood, but I could be classified as an alumni? Maybe you should buy stock in paper towels?? Glad you can find the humor in this and share it with us for a giggle. Keep on wipin'!

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  2. JQ - Perhaps you could be an emeritus member. :-)

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  3. I haven't checked Tess' blog yet, but according to your list, I'm an emeritus member. I have now bequeathed all these exciting adventures to my children.

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  4. You are so funny and I so wish it wasn't all true. I have to declare myself a former member unless my daughter convinces me we need a pet --again.
    Good luck!
    Wendy

    W.S. Gager on Writing

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  5. Sooo glad those days are long behind me.

    ~ Marti

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